Me, Myself, and I:
I'm still not quite sure what I can do about Oedipus, what I can do about this entire thing in general just because he still hasn't said anything. He comes home, looking like a zombie, he wakes up early, comes back late, and hardly even eats at home. I don't really know what I can do to console him, but he needs to open up.
If not to me, I wouldn't mind if he posts on this and doesn't tell anyone - or gets a psychologist and spills his life story - he just really needs to take out his bottled emotions. Maybe even like, kick-boxing or something. But he still hasn't come home, and it's nearly midnight.
That isn't like him at all. In all four years, I've never seen him so focused on his work - he used to come home, to at least be home with me for a short while. So we could talk - not usually about work, but usually about life in general, you know? I think that would be a great thing to talk about...I miss him.
Sorry for the emotional little entry, I'm trying to pretend life is normal,
- Jocasta
Thursday, 17 April 2014
Wednesday, 2 April 2014
Worrying
Hello Everyone,
I'm not sure what's going on with Oedipus, I'm kind of getting slightly worried. Even more than the last time. I've approached him about it multiple times, and it seems like he's going to say something and then he decides against and doesn't say it. He doesn't spend as much time at home - really no time at home, and he doesn't talk about anything. We used to joke around watching movies or TV shows or things like that, but I'm just not...I don't know what to do in order to make him - well, less-like whatever he is now, or whatever he has morphed into. But I can't say that kind of thing to him - not when I know that he's going through so much. And I know that he is because he's always - constantly distracted. And I'm not even half joking about being distracted, because I've seen it all first hand.
We used to go out all the time on Friday nights too. But he's "staying at work" or always making excuses that we haven't been in ages. I don't know how to start the conversation, because it seems like another woman is in the picture. But I know that's not like him. It's not like him to have an affair, but I don't think it's up to me to decide that either.
But I trust him - trust him more than I have trusted anyone, that I won't want to pretend that everything is okay. I want to wait for him to open up to me - we always end up being okay in the end, but at the same time, I don't know how this is going to turn out. I have faith in him, otherwise I wouldn't respect him for who he is. And I do truly respect him for that. I hope he comes to his senses and tells me, some time, anytime.
Part of me is telling myself that I should push him to tell me, but I've also never been that kind of person to ask him to tell me such a thing. I feel like I shouldn't need to push someone to admit something, that's just not who I am. We've always relied on the trust and emotions even to admit the hardest of things. I can't imagine being with anyone else, where you can't admit something...and feel like you won't be judged for it. Even when he had problems with the drug, he would admit it because he knew it would be easier to get off of his chest. But now, I don't know what to do because something has to be big enough that he's channeled all his anxiety into his work. What could be wrong? If there are any ideas, please - please do tell me.
Thank you for your listening ear,
-Jocasta
I'm not sure what's going on with Oedipus, I'm kind of getting slightly worried. Even more than the last time. I've approached him about it multiple times, and it seems like he's going to say something and then he decides against and doesn't say it. He doesn't spend as much time at home - really no time at home, and he doesn't talk about anything. We used to joke around watching movies or TV shows or things like that, but I'm just not...I don't know what to do in order to make him - well, less-like whatever he is now, or whatever he has morphed into. But I can't say that kind of thing to him - not when I know that he's going through so much. And I know that he is because he's always - constantly distracted. And I'm not even half joking about being distracted, because I've seen it all first hand.
We used to go out all the time on Friday nights too. But he's "staying at work" or always making excuses that we haven't been in ages. I don't know how to start the conversation, because it seems like another woman is in the picture. But I know that's not like him. It's not like him to have an affair, but I don't think it's up to me to decide that either.
But I trust him - trust him more than I have trusted anyone, that I won't want to pretend that everything is okay. I want to wait for him to open up to me - we always end up being okay in the end, but at the same time, I don't know how this is going to turn out. I have faith in him, otherwise I wouldn't respect him for who he is. And I do truly respect him for that. I hope he comes to his senses and tells me, some time, anytime.
Part of me is telling myself that I should push him to tell me, but I've also never been that kind of person to ask him to tell me such a thing. I feel like I shouldn't need to push someone to admit something, that's just not who I am. We've always relied on the trust and emotions even to admit the hardest of things. I can't imagine being with anyone else, where you can't admit something...and feel like you won't be judged for it. Even when he had problems with the drug, he would admit it because he knew it would be easier to get off of his chest. But now, I don't know what to do because something has to be big enough that he's channeled all his anxiety into his work. What could be wrong? If there are any ideas, please - please do tell me.
Thank you for your listening ear,
-Jocasta
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)