I shouldn't be saying this, but I'm sick of having no one to talk to, it's just not how I want to live my life.
Anyway, Cal and Gillian started talking with me today and asking me questions. The typical like:
"Was there anything wrong with your relationship?"
"How was your relationship with each other in the last 6 months? Last year?"
These were by far, the hardest questions I've had to answer. Because the one part of me just wants to shut everything down and tell them that it's perfectly fine, and to handle things myself. But the last time I tried that, it did not go well. I realize that they're waiting for my answer and with the pressure and the anger and resentment from the past few months, I couldn't handle it anymore. I broke down in front of them, making me look like a weak-ass, but at the time, I couldn't care less. They caught onto my emotions before the tear even slipped out, and them everything that had happened between Oedipus and I the entire time. I just don't know what else to say; that we were a perfect couple in the beginning, and then suddenly, very suddenly, we just stopped.
They told me that they had found some blueprints and some plans of a building on Queen Street in Downtown Toronto, but I had no idea what those were for. They weren't willing to tell me either, and I pushed them to tell me what the matter was, and they did end up telling me. They told me that they suspect it was for a robbery or some kind of crime. I was absolutely horrified. That's nothing like Oedipus - I know, for a fact, that if he was in the right mind, he would never kill anybody! I'm not even half joking anymore, I just...I can't see him as the same person anymore, because I know that he couldn't have gotten away or even done anything like that.
Maybe that's why he didn't go home? But the Lightman Group talked to the police and they said that there hasn't been any reported burglaries or anything of the nature, so I don't think it has something to do with that, but the fact that he even had those blueprints is absolutely mind-blowing. I thought he would talk to me about it - but he must have had a good reason for it. It has to be the reason for everything, he just must have had a really good reason for the different things that he's done. When the Lightman Group finds him, I hope he's wiling to talk to me and tell me what triggered all of this.
- Jocasta
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